January Blues

Ah, January. The start of a new year. All the gyms suddenly fill up, companies try to sell diet plans on the telly, and dry January becomes a thing. Everyone’s talking about their goals and resolutions, vowing to make this year the Best Year Yet. Social media is full of people talking about all of their exciting plans. I’m so guilty of this too (hard evidence as shown in my New Year Goals post); I think it’s in the back of a lot of people’s minds. It’s like the New Year fireworks were starting pistols on our aspirations for the coming year.

Is it really good for us though? We put ourselves under enormous pressure to become immediately better – “New year, new me!” is a common phrase in January. But honestly, Christmas was only five minutes ago, and if you’re anything like me you ate a lot of a food that was terrible for you (my recently-lifted chocolate ban didn’t help matters). You probably also drank more alcohol and moved less. The weather was shite, which makes people feel miserable as it is. January is a post-indulgence slump and a weird, suspended time where people are easing back into work and everyday life. Nobody knows what day it is. Everyone feels a bit wistful because after all the months of planning, buying, and decorating, the festive period is over and everyone is grumpy again – it’s cold and we’re all skint. Looking at it like this makes me think we’re all mad for wanting to stress ourselves more with resolutions to look better, feel better, be better.

Just because our calendars dictate that a new year has begun (I’m still pissed at Pope Gregory XIII for putting these constraints on us), doesn’t mean that you have to instantly change or attain your goals. I’m not magically well again and I need to stop holding myself up to ridiculous standards. Saying “Omg, it’s 10 days into 2018 and you’ve done NOTHING.” is really unhelpful. Quite aside from the fact that I have done things, there are 355-ish days left of the year, plenty of time to work on my list of goals for 2018. My ultimate downfall is trying to look really far ahead instead of focusing on smaller, more attainable tasks that will eventually add up to my Ultimate Goals. I think it’s an anxiety thing – constantly feeling like you’re running out of time, even though you objectively aren’t.

It’s brilliant to have goals and to want to improve yourself and your life, obviously. But it shouldn’t come at the expense of your mental or physical health. Goals should be just that: something to work towards, and not to beat yourself up over. Some things you want to do simply won’t be possible in the relatively short time of a year, and that’s ok. Part of my recovery process is learning to be a lot nicer to myself. It’s arduous as I’m incredibly, notoriously hard on myself and hold myself up to standards that I can’t possibly meet right now. Acknowledging the shitness of January and how crap I feel post-festivities, and the fact that “New year, new me!” is a positive statement and not an order, is part of my self-care. I need to make the time to feel rubbish for a bit, and get some rest.

I think I will follow Chinese New Year (16th February) this year. I’ve decided, for my own mental wellbeing, that January is a write-off, a prep month for the actual year. Apologies to my Mum, Nan, Stepmum, best pal Lana, and everyone else who was born in January (happy birthday btw) – your month is crummy and I refuse to participate.

I’m aware that my very sporadic blogging has been pretty negative of late, but let’s be honest - I’m not exactly in a positive place. Unfortunately you get all of me, including the shite. This post came completely by surprise; I was suddenly awash with the urge to write something about how shoddy it all is and seized that by the horns. Maybe next I’ll write about being the most half-arsed blogger of All Time. We’ll see.

How do you tackle January blues and find motivation? How do you function like an actual person when everything’s a bit miserable? I’d love to hear your thoughts and strategies – so I can immediately nick them and try them out. Despite my moaning, I hope everyone, me included (being nicer to myself, see?), has a great 2018!