I fully intended for 2020 to be ~my year~. For the past few years, things have been unpredictable in my life due to my health. At the end of 2019, I felt that I was finally in a position where I could manage my condition enough to start rebuilding. I had so many plans for work, skills, social life – man, I’d even planned to do something on my birthday. I’ve heard similar sentiments from a lot of people this year, and I think a lot of people’s big plans were scuppered in 2020.
Despite spending most of the year in lockdown and in the
midst of a pandemic, I still managed to get some things done and have a few
experiences that I value so much. I did begin writing this post in
chronological order but soon got fed up. Instead, I’ve sorted stuff into
categories to make things a bit neater.
Covid-19
No 2020 recap will be complete without mentioning Covid-19.
The biggest and fastest-moving pandemic the world has seen since the 1918
Spanish Flu, the whole planet started to grind to a halt as country after
country was brought to its knees by the virus.
The year has been a weird one. We’ve all been in a
semi-suspended animation, with all of our plans put on hold indefinitely while
the crisis was dealt with. When Boris officially shut most everything on March
23rd, I started having long walks (anywhere from 3.5-6 miles at
a time) away from people in the countryside, and trying to keep productive as
well as maintaining my mental health. I got a newfound appreciation for where I
live because there’s a lot of open space where you can get a good walk and keep
your distance appropriately. We were blessed with insanely good weather for
months, which was a small silver lining. More exercise and more Vitamin D for
us!
It was a scary time, especially as I have family in the NHS.
As well as worrying for their safety, I also got to hear some horrible insights
from the front lines. There was uncertainty, limited social contact, financial
stress, and more. It’s had a marked effect on
everyone and I won’t be surprised if it takes some of us a long time to
recover, both physically and mentally. On the bright side, I did get my Yearly
Purge done in record time.
After the rules were relaxed a bit and infections
predictably shot right back up, a second month-long lockdown began in November.
So I was back to walking outside again, having only just gotten back into a
routine of going to the gym (I’d like to note here that my gym was really
brilliant about hygiene and following the rules). This time it was walking in
cold, grey and often wet weather which was a drag but made for some lovely
early-morning misty photos.
As of writing, I haven’t gotten Covid myself, though I know
plenty of people who have. My heart goes out to the people who have lost so
much this year – family, friends, loved ones, jobs, homes… The list goes on.
As the vaccines have become available, I’m hopeful that the end is in sight. We
still have to follow the rules and there’s still a fight ahead of us but with
any luck this will be under control eventually. My request to the universe is
that we don’t have yet another historically significant event for a little
while. Please, we’re very tired.
Travel
In January, we were all blissfully unaware of how serious
things were about to get, so I spent the beginning of the year looking forward
to my long-planned trip to Tokyo. I am so
lucky to have gone for many reasons – our amazing half-price deals, the
oncoming pandemic, being able to save enough money to pull it off, etc. Tokyo
was literally the number one place on my wanderlust list, and I’ll never get
over my amazing trip there. If you haven’t read the blogs yet, definitely do it because it took me forever
to write them. I can’t wait to return one day and explore more of Japan.
In September, between lockdowns, I had my little trip away
to Yorkshire with my mum and stepdad. Again, have a read if you haven’t
already – the blogs for this trip ‘only’ took two months to write. It was nice
to get away after being stuck at home for around six months. I also got to
visit Whitby, another place at the top of my list, which was magical.
Work
In January, I left my volunteer position at English Heritage in order to focus solely on getting back into paid work. I had
big plans about getting a job and finally learning to drive, then Covid came. Suddenly,
a lot of people had lost their jobs and were in the market for a new one,
making things more competitive. A lot of places stopped hiring entirely while
they rode out the pandemic. It was really bleak.
Having said that, though, I did manage to apply to a few
jobs throughout the year. Unfortunately nothing came of these applications, but
I’m ready to redouble my efforts in the new year.
Poe & Mochi
My darling hamster Poe passed away in January, from old age.
I was absolutely devastated and I still think about him all the time. He was
such a comfort to me in the last couple of years, when things have been really
difficult. I’d never met such an eccentric hamster who was as grumpy as I am. He
was just lovely, truly one of a kind and I’ll miss him forever.
For some months, I didn’t have any interest in looking for a
new hamster. I did eventually want another one, because having a tiny furry
friend is good for mental health, but losing Poe was so crap that I couldn’t
handle being attached to another animal just yet.
When I was ready
though, there were no hamsters anywhere. Pet shops had stopped bringing in
stock, as they weren’t allowed to sell live animals during the lockdown. There were
plenty of independent breeders in the north of the country, or closer to London,
but nothing reasonably near me.
In October, I struck
gold. I called a local pet shop and they told me they were getting hamsters in
and that they would be available that weekend. I got to the pet shop at opening
time, as they’d warned me it was first come, first served. Apparently hamsters
had been selling out on the same day they were put out on the shop floor – I know
lots of people invested in pets this year, so I can believe it.
After an agonising decision (I wanted every single hamster,
but that was not practical), I found him. A tiny
ginger-and-white boy with bright red eyes, running like mad on a flying saucer toy. I named him Mochi, after a snack I’d really enjoyed in Japan. We got
him home and left him alone to settle into his cage.
He did not give us his love easily. I had to be really
patient, as he took forever to tame. Usually,
we’ve been super lucky with hamsters and gotten them more or less trained
within a couple of weeks. I’ve had Mochi for a couple of months now, and he’s
still not entirely there yet. I can
now pick him up and kiss and cuddle him, which he completely forbade before,
but I still don’t trust him enough to take him too far from his cage. But I adore
him – he’s hilarious, energetic and just darling. It’s nice to have a pet in
the house again.
Health & Fitness
I started calorie counting in mid-August and I’ve lost 24lbs
(10.0kg) so far. I still have a ways to go (and I probably put on weight over
Christmas – I haven’t dared to check yet), but I’m really pleased because I’m
getting on well with it and I haven’t sacrificed anything that I like to eat. I’m
just being way more mindful about my intake, and exercising as regularly as I can.
I feel lighter and stronger.
My Birthday
This year, I actually had the beginnings of a plan for my
birthday. This was momentous as I never really bother doing anything on the
day, and only occasionally will go out around the time. I was determined to go
to London and meet friends and enjoy myself, but the world had different plans.
I had a nice day, but it still sucked to be stuck at home and unable to see
anyone. I imagine this is the story for most people, considering how much of
the year was taken up by stupid Covid.
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| A quarantine birthday selfie |
Writer’s Block
Can you even call yourself a writer if you don’t constantly have writer’s block? We’re so
temperamental and inspiration never strikes conveniently. I used to write all
the time, every single day. Now I’m lucky to even get 1000 words out in one
sitting. It’s annoying as all hell, and something I’ve been trying to combat.
I was beginning to succeed at the beginning of 2020 - I’d just started to work out some techniques.
Being a passenger in a car or bus and writing on the Notes app helped. In fact,
any change of scenery seemed to make a difference. I started frequenting a
local indie coffee shop and writing in there – for some reason I could focus
more in that sort of atmosphere. At home I begin to get distracted very easily,
so I tried Write or Die, which had some success. I always used kamikaze
mode, in which pausing causes what you’ve written to unwrite itself. I also
tried several speech-to-text apps, thinking that just talking it out and then
tidying it up would help. However, there isn’t a lot of accuracy in this method.
When the Covid lockdown began, I couldn’t travel freely or
sit in coffee shops anymore so my writing stagnated again. As a result, it took
me until October to actually finish
writing my blogs about the Tokyo trip. I felt like the worst writer ever.
Lately, my approach has been to write the second I ‘feel
like it’, and to continue writing until I get fed up. This means that my
self-set deadlines are often thrown out and I just have to go with the flow. Luckily
I’m not writing for anyone, and I don’t
exactly have a huge audience waiting with bated breath for my next post. Maybe
with time writing will come easily to me again. I hope so.
Christmas
I felt weirdly festive about Christmas this year. I think
that was the case for a lot of people because of the crap year everyone’s had. People
did seem a lot more Christmassy e.g. putting up their decs early, lots of
singing and wearing novelty Christmas clothes, and I saw a lot of random acts
of kindness leading up to the day. It was a really nice atmosphere – even Mariah
Carey didn’t annoy me as much as
usual.
We couldn’t have all of the family over – there’s usually up to 13 adults, 3 kids, 2 toddlers and a handful of dogs in our home during Christmas and that was way above the ‘6 people maximum’ rule that Boris had given us. I made sure I got all of my cards and gifts to everyone before the big day, though.
The news came two days before Christmas that my area would be
going into Tier 3 right after Christmas, which meant we couldn’t go to my
brother’s house for Boxing Day as we’d planned. It’s already set a bit of a
dark cloud over the new year, knowing we’ll be in stricter rules again, but I think
it’s necessary and important that we do this.
I still got my Christmas baking on, though! I made some lovely
Lebkuchen – I make some every year for my stepmum (who is German), and always a
large batch so I can eat some too. I also made chocolate fudge for a couple of
my niblings, Jack Daniels fudge for my dad and stepdad, and my traditional Yule
Log for the 4th year in a row. They all came out fantastically and
everyone was very pleased, including me.
We had my nan and her partner Alan in our Christmas bubble
on the day, so there was only five of us. It was a really nice day, way quieter
than usual. We had breakfast at leisure, spent two hours opening gifts and FaceTiming the family, and had dinner
later than we normally would because we had the time to relax more. I got some
lovely gifts and a decent wedge of money, and I’m so thankful for it all. It was
weird not going to my Dad’s for ‘second Christmas’ on Boxing Day, and I miss
all of my family very much. Hopefully sacrificing this Christmas will help
towards making sure next Christmas can be normal again.
I’m not planning to do owt on New Year’s Eve because of
being in Tier 3, so I’ll be drinking sparkly wine and probably not making it to
midnight again.
2020 Goals Recap
Here’s a checklist of the goals I set for myself this year,
and whether or not I managed to do them. I’m actually surprised at how many I’ve
completed fully or partially, considering the circumstances. It’s very
encouraging! This year was scary and difficult, but I definitely learned a lot
about myself and what I’m capable of under pressure.
Go abroad – I am
still pinching myself every day because I got to go to Tokyo. With everything
that happened this year, it’s unbelievable how lucky we got. We returned from
Japan barely three weeks before the first lockdown began and I’m still so
grateful and relieved that we got to have that trip.
Learn to drive -
This didn’t happen. Thanks again, Covid-19. However, I did begin the process at
the end of the year when I got a theory test book and started studying
for it. I’ve covered 4/14 of the sections in the book, regularly testing myself
and getting others to quiz me, and I’m already doing well in practice tests
(both questions and hazard perception). I’m determined to get my licence next
year!
Save money as much as
possible – Yes! Because I wasn’t out and about as I normally would be, I wasn’t
spending ‘random money’ (like buying coffee, picking up things that catch my
eye in the shops, etc). So I’ve got a nice bit of savings, as well as a decent
amount of money in the bank. I’m hoping to use it for my driving lessons and
getting my first car when the time comes.
Get back into paid
work – Alas, no. I talked about this earlier in the blog post, but I want
to add that I’m currently still waiting to hear back from a job I applied to.
So fingers crossed that the New Year brings new work!
Go to the gym three
times a week – Through no fault of my own, I couldn’t do this goal. The gym was closed for half of the year! However,
I did manage to exercise 2-3 times a week, fatigue allowing. I’m definitely
fitter and stronger than I was at the beginning of the year (not to mention
slimmer).
Read at least 15 books – I just managed to complete this. Despite being in lockdown and not having a lot to do this year, I found my interest in reading to be a bit sapped. I finished the 15th book in December, just in time to hit the goal. Here’s a list of what I read:
- Surviving the Evacuation series by Frank Tayell - The Last Candidate, Search and Rescue, Britain's End, and Future's Beginning
- Good Me, Bad Me by Ali Land
- Elevation by Stephen King
- The Institute by Stephen King
- The Warning by James Patterson and Robison Wells
- Billy Connolly's Route 66
- Dead Man's Hand by Mark Lock
- The Defence by Steve Cavanagh
- Autopsy Room Four by Stephen King
- Strange Weather by Joe Hill
- Anno Dracula by Kim Newman
- Haunted Japan by Catrien Ross
Continue
habits/symptom tracking – Honestly, I’m going to stop putting this on my
yearly goals list, because it’s become a natural part of my life now. I’ve been
tracking stuff for like three years, and I find it really useful and
enlightening. I will keep doing this for as long as I find helpful. I started
working on a new chart book way in advance for next year and it’s minimalistic
but cute – I may or may not make a post about it someday.
Do Yearly Purge –
Done! As I mentioned earlier, I got it done in record time this year. I had
little distraction because we were in full lockdown at the time I did it
(March), so it was a breeze. I’m still managing to rid myself of things every
year, which is amazing, though all of the stuff I want to get rid of is sat in
boxes in the spare room because we couldn’t take it anywhere!
Eat more
healthily/cut down junk food – I am calorie counting and staying within my
set goals. I’ve learned new, healthier recipes and eat well-balanced
breakfasts. I’m definitely eating a lot more healthy food than I probably ever
have. I cut down having takeaways to once a week, if that. I still have all of
the food I like, just in way more moderation.
Get a tattoo – NO
AGAIN. I wanted to get one around my birthday but then, of course, Covid came
along and scuppered those plans.
Blog more – I definitely
wrote more blog posts this year than I have in a long time, so by sheer volume I
did achieve this goal. However, I only wrote posts about the two trips I took. Meaning
it wasn’t very varied content-wise. I’ll call this a ‘kind of’ completed one.
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I imagine I’m not unlike a lot of people who are glad to see the back of this year. It tested everyone in so many different ways, and there was so much loss and fear. I really hope that things begin to mend and go smoothly again in 2021 – I wish you all luck in the New Year!
